I couldn't have wished for a better birth for this pair. Becky and Barry were booked into my class in November last year, but nature and timing had other ideas for us, so I was delighted when they told me they were coming to the first class of 2024.
It was visible from space just how good a team they were going to be. Becky could have told Barry she was birthing their baby in a field holding the beard of a goat and this guy would have been out looking for the best goat in Angus to make her wishes come true.
This is the story of their birth, in their words, and to say that I'm proud of them like they are my own bairns is an understatement. They held their ground, they stayed calm, and they declined the things that they didn't want. They got this birth and I'm just lucky they have let me share it with you.
My Positive Birth Story
"From early days of pregnancy, I had created a vision in my mind of how I wanted the arrival of my first child to go. I knew I wanted as little intervention as possible. So, my fiance Barry and I decided to do whatever we could to give us the best chance to make this a reality. We also decided not to find out the gender of our baby until birth.
Barry and I attended Birth and Conquer’s Hypnobirthing classes in January together, where we learned all there is to know about labour and 4th trimester, as well as birth rights and navigating NHS maternity services. This is easily one of the best decisions we made as a couple. We approached the birth date feeling strong and able to advocate for ourselves. I also kept going to the gym throughout my pregnancy and over my due date, went for regular walks and attended prenatal yoga with Akhanda Soul Yoga, where I also learned and practiced breathing techniques to get through the contractions to come.
At 01:00 on Tuesday 9th April 2024, 10 days over my due date, I knew I had gone into early labour, experiencing very mild and manageable contractions. Leading up to this date, as I had felt the pressure of accepting induction. This is something I stated on my birth plan I did not want, and so when I went into labour naturally, the way I had always hoped, I felt a great sense of relief, as well as faith in my body. It knew exactly what it was doing and so did baby. I used this time wisely. I relaxed and prepared for the journey ahead. I ran myself a bath and listened to my favourite songs. On reflection, I should have slept a bit more to reserve some energy for what was to come. Barry woke up early morning and we spent the rest of the day together resting. I used the yoga ball to work through each contraction as well as breathing techniques I had learned at prenatal yoga and Hypnobirthing. The power of breath work got me through this time and I was still able to have a laugh with Barry throughout the very early stages.
By the late evening on the 9th April, the contractions became so intense that I did start to panic. My fear response was telling me that it was time to go to hospital. However when we got there, we were informed that we were not in established labour yet which I also knew deep down too. So, we came home and I continued to work through the contractions there. I was so physically exhausted due to lack of sleep by this point (around 02:00 on 10th April) and so working through the contractions became more challenging. I honestly believe fate stepped in at this point, because my waters broke which meant we needed to go to hospital. Barry drove me back and reassured me that everything was going to be OK.
When we arrived at hospital again, the midwives were so welcoming and reassured me that they had read my birth plan in full. They were already filling the pool for me and had a projector Bluetooth speaker on, ready for me to connect my music. The midwives gave me gas and air immediately and when I sat down next to the pool, I felt almost euphoric about what was to come, even when having contractions.
Barry held me through it all.
My memory is patchy but I remember his arms wrapped around me tightly, repeatedly telling me how proud he was of me and that he would never let me go. He made me laugh, gave me water and reminded me how to breathe. In my birth plan, I did state I would accept diamorphine and I asked for this. This allowed the two of us 2 hours to sleep and reserve some energy for the remainder of the journey. The midwives were keen for me to stick to my birth plan, even when my fear response was to ask for more pain relief, they re directed me back to what they knew I wanted.
We soldiered on with gas and air, and a snickers (lol) At the end stages of labour, the midwives reminded me to change my breathing techniques to short, shallow breaths. That’s when I knew I was very close to meeting our child. I don’t remember this part, but Barry tells me that “Wild Horses,” by The Rolling Stones came on at this point and Barry said “oh my god, I think our baby is going to be born to Wild Horses,” and he could resonate with the lyrics. At 12:26 on 10th April, our baby was beneath me in the water. Time stopped. It was single handedly the best moment of our entire lives. We stared at her in disbelief for a moment before I pulled her from the water and picked her up in my arms. When we realised she was a girl we both collapsed into tears of absolute joy, and spent this time holding each other and her. “It’s Heidi,” I cried repeatedly. Our whole world changed for the better in an instant.
The midwives gave us space to enjoy each other and skin to skin. Heidi latched on and began feeding with no problems whatsoever.
I delivered the placenta, which is now buried in our back garden underneath two sweet chestnut trees. We are eternally grateful to the placenta for nourishing Heidi, and so Barry gave it the send off it deserved. Every time we look out of our bedroom window we will watch our chestnut trees grow alongside Heidi for years to come.
Hours before I went into labour, Barry and I took a visit to the Pictish stone near our home that looks on to our cottage, not knowing what was about to happen. Every year from now, we will revisit the stone as a reminder of the greatest day of our lives."
